Posted by: Erin | January 26, 2008

Bitter Infertile

Tonight DH & I went to a friend’s place for the weekly poker game.   Except that tonight I had to set across from a very pregnant woman - rubbing her belly lovingly all night long.

Let me be perfectly clear.  There is only ONE pregnant woman that I like.  UNO.  She is wonderful and I couldn’t be more happy for her (yes, that’s you Sam).  Anyone else?  Kindly leave me alone.  I feel as if (fertile) pregnant women everywhere are continually seeking me out… to kill what ever sanity I still had remaining.

I don’t want to see their pregnant bellies.  Or their happy faces.

Yes, I am miserable.  I am a bitter infertile, hear me roar!

Responses

IF I thought you might listen, I’d have alot to say. “Motherly” advice you might say! I’m sorry for your frustrations tho. I know it’s hard. But some of your posts are downright disturbing.

And very sad! There’s alot of women in your age group who are pregnant. Alienating yourself does nothing for your cause.

i don’t think your post is disturbing. i totally understand and feel quite similar. i often feel like i’m surrounded by pregnant bellies and newborns in the mall, grocery stores.. everywhere.. just there to remind me of what i don’t have.

Oh, honey. I’m so so so so so sorry for what you’re dealing with. Infertility is a soul-sucking, life-draining futhermucker of a disease, and it changes absolutely everything about you.

I know you don’t want to hear it, but please try and hold on to the little bit of happy you may have left. My husband and I have been trying for 6 years to have a baby. We did years of metformin, 3 rounds of clomid, 3 rounds of femara, met with an adoption coordinator, and seriously thought about stealing a baby from one of the endless stream of young twits at Walmart.

I only have one defective ovary, too. My left one got yanked out in April of 2006 due to an endometrial cyst that was the size of a large orange.

If you need a shoulder to cry on, I’m built like a linebacker.

Kriss: You have your right ovary, and I have my left one…. if we teamed up we could have a set! :)

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