I’ve changed my mind
I had my 36 week checkup today. My blood pressure meds are helping and the doctor has ordered me on bed rest. And that’s really all I have to say on that subject.
In other news…I’ve changed my mind. I don’t want to give birth. This little baby can stay right where he is at forever if that’s what he wants. We’re happy like this..why change it?
I know, I know…I’m sounding crazy. But, I just received some horrible news that has frightened me about this next step … birth.
A friend of mine – an online friend – who has been near and dear to me throughout the pregnancy (we are due close together) had a scheduled c-section last week. Her baby is healthy and she has two small boys at home as well. But a few dayslater…she died. I’m still not clear on all the details, I only know that she died as a result of the c-section.
…and now I’m terrified of giving birth. Not to mention the fact that I’m trying to keep calm while grieving for this wonderful woman, who at the age of 26 has been taken from her family without any rhyme or reason…
Ack …holy crisis @ 36 weeks.
Bed rest ..ick. I will say though that they put my best friend on bed rest at the same stage for the same reasons …and after 2 days she started peeing like a broken faucet every 10 minutes and all the swelling went away. So it was crappy …but effective.
I distinctly remember having the same feeling about birth. It was the realization that somehow this child was coming out ..and I didn’t like any of the options. Too bad that xanax can’t be taken in pregnancy.
And ..the friend ..I’m so, so very sorry. Is it someone with a blog? Someone who’s family we could help supprt??
No, she didn’t have a blog.
She was able to have 4 days with her baby before she died. I’m getting more information trickling in slowly…it sounds like she went home and 4 days later died of a staph infection.
Holy Crap. I have never heard anything so tragic. That is simply awful, and I can’t imagine what her family must be going through.
I have to admit, that since I found out I am having a section soon, I have been swinging from delight at having my baby in just a few days, and dread that I have to go through surgery, with all the risks it entails. I have had major surgery twice before, and both times I had this overwhelming fear that I would die or something would happen to me. I am getting these paranoid fears again, so you are not alone.
There are major risks involved with C sections, and although vaginal birth is better, C sections often save the lives of both mother and baby. I have been told already that the baby is likely to get stuck if I try a natural birth, and he? is laying at a diagonal angle, rendering vaginal birth almost impossible for me. However this baby has to come out some way, and through the sunroof it has to be.
I have tried really hard to think positive and just focus on the good things, but it’s hard. The fear of struggling to get all this way, with something going wrong at the end is haunting me dreadfully. The best thing I can suggest is just take each day as it comes, and focus on the baby’s safe arrival. There isn’t much longer to go, and although we hear about bad things happening to people all the time, you have to remember its astonishingly rare.
I hope your friends family can find they strength they need to get through this. I feel for you.
I know it’s scary and stressful to be where you are. So much information and different people’s experiences coming at you.
Keep in mind that c-sections are SO much safer than they used to be. Problems resulting from them are actually quite rare. I had one and I am still here. I know, it may not help you feel better but I will be praying for you and little Thor. *hugs*
Sorry I thought I had already written this…I am so sorry to hear about your friend. I also will be praying for her family and children… that is horrible!
I’m so sorry to hear about your friend, too.
Please don’t be afraid of a c-section. Your doctors and nurses will be keeping a close eye on you. They check your incision about 10 times a day, and you’ll know if you have any signs of an infection.
If you have to have one, just keep the area under your belly really clean and dry. This might be TMI, but I kept a maxi pad or a bunched up washcloth tucked under my remaining chub roll, to keep the skin around the incision dry.
You’ll be okay. And if you have any suspicion of an infection, call your doctor immediately.
(((((hugs)))))